Lazy, Hazy, Crazy Days of Merlin
by the electric phantom
Summary: Drabbles showing the absolute craziness of Camelot. Rated T just in case.
1. Chapter 1

**A.N.: Hi, all! These drabbles will range from heartfelt family to utter ridiculousness. I hope you enjoy the first of many of these!**

Chapter 1: Uni, Uni, Uni, Unicorns!

One day, King Arthur found an injured unicorn.

"MERLIN! I found an injured unicorn!" Merlin, who had been watching the horses, ran in from the left, tripped over a low branch, and rolled towards Arthur.

At the sight of the hurt unicorn, Merlin began bawling. This made Arthur feel even more horrible and he too started to cry. A Druid girl came and collected their tears.

"Don't not weep King Arthur, nor you, Emrys. I can save this poor creature."

She conjured up a flat surface to work on.

"Emrys, do you have any rabbit fur?" Merlin plucked some fur from a fluffy bunny he was carrying.

"Thank you. Now, the spell. Yare' theso mane' soonzbout ranbos" she chanted calmly. The unicorn sprang back into action.

Agravaine, who had noticed the disappearance of his nephew and the stupid boy Marlon, or whatever his name was, came strolling lazily onto the scene to see if Morgana had killed them. He saw the girl use magic.

"Arthur! Arrest her!"

"No way, she saved the pretty unicorn!"

"But she used _magic_, Arthur!"

"Oh, look! It's Morgana undressing!" Merlin yelled, pointing. Agravaine looked around and was thoroughly disappointed to find out elsewise.

"Uncle, you are under arrest for treason."

"NO!"

"Yes! Oh, Emrys, now you don't have to worry about the creep!" the Druid girl said as she hugged Merlin.

"I didn't do anything," the bashful warlock mumbled.

"You saved a few dozen serving girls from being in bed with him. That's enough for me."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: The Sandlot**

Ten-year-old Merlin, who had rarely been outside, watched the other boys playing a strange ball game. Hunith saw him looking out.

"Go ahead, Merlin. Go play."

"What do I do? What do I say?"

"Anything. Just try to have some fun, okay, Merlin?"

"All right, Mom," he went outside.

"Hi!" he said cheerfully to the boys. One boy smiled, but the others ignored him. From the distance, he watched them playing catch. He became so fascinated that he didn't notice when a boy named Geoffrey threw the ball to him. It ended up hitting him on the face. Most of the kids laughed; except for the boy who had smiled, who ran over.

"You okay- oh, that's gonna bruise," he said before looking at the others, "Sorry about them. They're all right; just not used to you, I guess. I'm Will."

"Merlin."

And this was how they met. At, you guessed it (I don't know, did you?), the sandlot.

**A.N.: Yeah… I was watching the movie as I wrote this. Does it show? Anyways, I'd love to have some reviews soon! I mean ones where people say if they liked the story or not reviews. Please? *insert most adorable puppy dog eyes ever***


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: You Sexy Thang

Elyan and Leon were watching Gwaine proclaim his love with some amusement

"I believe in miracles! Where you from, you sexy thang? You sexy thang, you. Where did you come from, baby? How did you know I needed you? How did you know I needed you so badly? How did you know I'd give my heart gladly!" he sang.

"This is amazing," Leon whispered. Elyan nodded.

"Yesterday, I was one of the lonely people! Now you're lying close to me, making love to me!"

"Now?" Elyan asked.

"Not yet!" Leon said, clearly enjoying himself. However, Gwaine started dancing at this point, which was too much for the honorable knight.

"Alright. Now." The dragged their comrade away from a confused Agravaine.

**A.N.: I really don't remember how or why I came up with this idea, but it's one of many. If you like, I could possibly make a sequel. Only your reviews can tell!**


	4. Chapter 4

**A.N.: This is based off of a party I was at last night. We were fighting off a monster, but it wouldn't go away. I immediately thought that the knights should have to kill off the beast.**

**Chapter 4: The Evilest Evils**

Uther Pendragon sighed. There had been so many reports of children being attacked. Something had to be done. He decided that Arthur would take his finest fighters to kill the horrible foe.

As the Knights of the Bromance rode along, Merlin kept asking the same question: what was the monster? Finally, Arthur snapped.

"I don't know what the monster is, Merlin! No one does! All we know is that the people of Camelot are being attacked. Now, come on!" This shut everyone up until they reached a river.

"What's that noise?" asked Leon.

"It sounds like screaming!" exclaimed Gwaine.

"It's a little girl," added Percival. Everyone ran their hardest to find her. When they did, they saw a horrible, flying monster.

"Merlin, protect the horses!" Arthur yelled, "Percival, take care of the girl!" Both nodded and went to their consecutive tasks.

As they did so, the others waded into the river, preparing to fight their foe. It lunged at Arthur, who was terrified as he stared into its many eyes. He dunked himself down. The beast moved onto Leon, who screamed girlishly before being shoved into the water by Gwaine. When the thing came to him, he started frantically checking his hair to make sure it was okay. Elyan then proceeded to whack him on the head with the hilt of his sword.

"It's useless!" screamed Lancelot, "We'll never survive without reinforcements!" Leon nodded.

"We have to get out of here!" screamed Arthur. They all ran back to the horses. Merlin and Percival (who was still carrying the little girl) followed. As they rode off from the danger, Merlin began to laugh.

"What's so funny, Merlin?" Arthur asked after about an hour of his manservant cracking up.

He gasped for air. "I can't believe it! You kill dragons, wyverns, and all that stuff, but you can't kill a horsefly!"


End file.
